xandiland said: What happened to brainy-but-not-condescending guy? Though I totally get the whole “happily single” thing. I’m just curious
Short version: He asked if he could call me his girlfriend and I freaked out.
Longer version: The whole time we were dating I was conflicted because he was really nice and had lots of attractive qualities and he was fun to be with but I didn’t actually want to be dating anyone. So now I am not dating anyone, which is what I actually wanted, and it feels pretty good.
When I was in pre-school, my class had a pajama party scheduled. I was so looking forward to it—I had planned very carefully with my mom to wear my matching Barney the dinosaur pajamas. At school, my teachers were going to make pancakes. It was the preK social event of the year.
I got chicken pox that week, so I couldn’t go to school for the pajama party. I cried.
“We’ll have our own pajama party!” Mom insisted. I wore my Barney pjs and Mom stayed in her pajamas all day, too. And she made me pancakes and we watched Disney movies.
That time she spilled hot grease on her foot and ended up in the hospital and scarred? She was cooking for me, my favorite, her homemade fried chicken and gravy, because I was coming over and if nothing else she was always determined to cook for me.
She cried when I showed her my scholarship letter to Pitt. “I always knew my baby would get herself a scholarship,” she said to me tearfully.
At my high school awards ceremony, they read a paragraph of my winning essay before announcing my name. Mom said afterwards, “I knew it was yours as soon as they started reading. That surprises you, doesn’t it? You think I wouldn’t know your writing, but I will always be able to tell when it’s my baby girl.” I was surprised, but I didn’t doubt her.
My mother’s love for me is intense, unconditional, and in spite of everything, uncomplicated. Thanks, Mom, and happy Mother’s Day.
I enjoy talking on the phone with people I am close to.
I am not comfortable enough with him yet to want to talk on the phone to him.
But he insists on calling rather than texting to make plans.
I guess it’s more civilized or personal or something, but I don’t have time for that.
My big brother turns 27 today!
This past weekend he went to visit our dear mother in Kentucky. I don’t remember the last time he went down there, to be honest; it’s been more than five years.
When I called today, he was already out at the local bar in the rural MI town we both call home, so our talk was brief.
“How was it? Nothing too traumatic?”
Long pause. Thoughtful pauses are unusual for Big Brother. “It was all right,” he finally said, slowly. “But it will be a long time before I go back down there.”
“Yeah. I’m glad you went.”
“Me too. I’ll give you a call later.”
When we were very small, Big Brother was a champion blanket-and-pillow-fort builder. I loved watching him assemble the forts, especially because he wasn’t terribly interested in them once he was finished and was happy to let me hang out in them with a book.
Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Success! I seem to have not scared him off yet. Date #3 will be Saturday afternoon.
The change of venue was a good call. He brought perfectly acceptable wine and apologized for not asking about my wine preference.
We talked for a long time. He is easy to talk to. He’s definitely a huge nerd, but he carries it differently than other nerdy guys I’ve dated. I think it’s confidence, or self-acceptance, or something. I like it.
He asked about my romantic history. I sort of felt like it was too soon for that; on the other hand, we are both admittedly dating in search of a relationship, so I sort of liked getting that all established and out of the way. He was never pushy or intrusive, and I never felt pressured.
He is a Steelers fan, although he does not agree with me that PGH>Bmore. Says I’m biased. (Maybe.)
We talked about the importance of intellectual curiosity and ambition and being passionate about your work.
I think he is the first grown up I have dated, though it might be a little early to tell.